The RumChata Epidemic

If you live under a rock, you do not know what RumChata is.  And I feel bad for you.  But I am about to do my civic duty as a human being an educate you. 

Let’s get the boring stuff out of the way right out of the gate…

WHAT IS IT:  So as not to sound redundant and plagiarize how about you just go to their website and research this yourself?  You must be 21 or older.  Which always fascinated me, because who the hell is going to say no?  Anyway, click on this link; you will be glad you did.  http://www.rumchata.com/

More importantly than what it is, is probably how it entered my life.  Through my sister.  And it entered her life through our friend Christy.  (Who was named after the Lord Jesus himself, so it is only fitting that she is kind of turning “water into wine” which is quite fascinating.)  I am not 100% sure how the story goes, but I am positive one of them will correct me if it is wrong.  Apparently Christy was having a fire in her fire pit one night and invited whoever wanted to come and if they wanted to know what to bring her, they could bring her some RumChata.  Well.  Sister, being the inquisitive person that she is, thought what the hell is that, so she did what she should have done and she Googled it.  She knew immediately that she would love it.  I knew immediately if she loved it so much I would not, we have nothing in common.  I will admit I was wrong.

And thus began the RumChata epidemic.  First Sister started including it in everything I posted on Facebook…even if it had nothing to do with drinking.  It got a little annoying.  RumChata this, RumChata that.  Then other people started finding it, because apparently Sister has the power to get a lot of people to drink something.  (The last time someone tried to do this, people lost their lives, thank God it is not kool-aid.)  Then more people started trying it.  People were asking for it in bars and liquor stores all over the Midwest.  Little did we know it has been in the Midwest for quite some time?  In fact…this Caribbean Rum delight is distributed in Wisconsin.  WISCONSIN YOU SAY?  YES.  I DO.  IN GOD’S COUNTRY.  I am considering making a road-trip up there myself.  I bet I can buy it cheaper.  Anyway, one of my dearest friends in the world (who happens to live in Wisconsin) is all like, “oh yeah, I have some of that in my fridge.”  FOR THE LOVE.  And you tell no one about this? 

I do not know how Sister has created such an epidemic, probably with the help of social media, but she has.  And it is all people talk about.  Very few conversations take place without discussing it.  In fact, at one of our most recent Holiday Cheer parties, Cindy Lou Who, brought a whole bottle to share with whoever was fortunate enough to show up.  Not only is that kind and generous, but extremely unselfish as well, because if you have had it, you would understand that you don’t mind sharing as long as everyone has their own bottle.

Some say it is a hug from Jesus.  I do not disagree.  Some say it tastes like Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Cinnamon Rolls, Snickerdoodle Cookies…I get Snickerdoodle Cookie, every single time.  What I would normally call an “aperitif,” I am quite confident you could drink this any damn time you wanted.  It is a nice “coat your belly” and calms it after a meal drink, but it is incredibly fun to just do a shot of as well.

Now…I love it.  I really do.  Probably one of only 5 things my sister and I truly love together.  I do not love it like she loves it.  How much does she love it you ask?  Well…it is like this…

1. She loves it so much she won’t throw the bottles away because they are too pretty and she is just positive someone will Pinterest a creative crafty thing to do with those beautiful bottles real quick like.
2. She loves it so much she bought the matching coffee mugs, because you know, everyone should have one.
3. She loves it so much she drinks it straight out of the bottle during family game night.  (According to Kolbie, she had been drinking out of the bottle for 2 hours, so at least she paces herself.)
4. She loves it so much; she drives it around for other friends to taste it.  Taste it.  Meaning she will bring you a sample, but hell no she isn’t leaving the bottle.
5. She loves it so much she delivers it in the stealth of the night down by the railroad tracks, potentially putting herself in grave danger.
6. She loves it so much she makes breakfast with it. 
7. She loves it so much she would like a flask for Christmas (in her stocking of course) for those times when you know, you are just sitting there wishing you had a flask of RumChata.
8. She loves it so much she practices with it to make random drinks and sends texts telling people of her findings.  Well, maybe just I…but it is not a text you expect at 7PM on a Sunday night.  The point is she loves it a lot.  
9. She loves it so much, that if you cared about her, which a lot of people do, you would never want her to stop loving it, or for RumChata to hurt her in any way, because the repercussions of having to deal with her disappointment over it would be too unbearable.  I personally do not recall a time in our lives that she has ever loved something more.  An inanimate object that is.

The Caribbean, Wisconsin, Facebook, Christy, Sister, whoever you want to associate the responsibility too, has single handedly brought RumChata to the forefront of most all of our conversations this Holiday Season.  It is not something you can describe to someone.  A person has to try it themselves.  I have yet to meet someone who didn’t like it.  A lot of people like it, probably not to the extent that she does, but we can’t all love the same things to that extent now can we?

I personally think we need to have a RumChata party.  And try it in a variety of different foods and beverages.  It could change a life…it really already has.

If you have not tried it, please do.  So you can make the decision yourself.  Is it really as amazing as she says it is?  Yes.  It really is?  Is it as big as the second coming or sliced bread?  Now, that may be getting a little carried away.  But if you could see the sparkle in her eye when she sees a bottle, or when she is just carrying her own personal bottle around (like a Christmas hobo), or at a surprise birthday party when the topic comes up and someone says, oh I need to try that, and she is all like, hang on a second and you can, I have some right here in my cooler that I take with me wherever I go.  And if you don’t like that, which is too bad, I also have vodka, usually UV Blue, beer and a variety of other beverages should you not be able to make a decision as to what to drink like I have a problem with…

But seriously though…she is like a little kid at Christmas and that to me is worth the $20 it costs…

RumChata to all and to all a goodnight!