Not because I'm trying to forget, as I've done in the past, but because my throat hurts. Bad. Cold, sinus, allergies who knows. The entire town of Knoxville must be sick too. The Dollar General was out of every over the counter allergy and sinus medicines they carry.
I love whiskey. If you know me you know this. I'm partial to Irish and blended scotch whiskeys. It was not something I ever would've dreamed I would try.
But I can thank Dad for that...
I had come home from Minnesota one year for Christmas, sicker than hell, through a blizzard, going 20 mph for at least 4 hours. It was one of the longest days of my life. I cried for the entire drive. I think by the time I got to Cedar Rapids I was out of the snow.
When I arrived home I walked in the front door where mom and Dad were anxiously waiting for me, which was unusual because we rarely used that door.
I threw my luggage on the floor with myself and cried. Mom put me to bed and called her Dr the next morning.
When I got home from seeing the Dr she put me in her recliner and told me to rest. They ran some blood work and wouldn't have them back for a few days. In the meantime here's a z pack and some steroids. I was coughing. I couldn't breathe. It was the worst cold of my life.
My father who adamantly hated taking any kind of meds said, ahhhh bullshit. She needs a Doc Johnson special. Rita, where the hell is the honey? Shortly after he shows up with a steaming hot mug of God knows what and tells me to drink it. Drink it right down. What's in it I say, don't you worry he says.
Within minutes, my feet were warm and then eventually I couldn't even feel them. I'm laying there moving my head like I'm stoned but instantly stopped coughing. My mother noticing the change and realizing I'm barely moving my head starts screaming Jesus Jim I think you are killing her! Jesus Rita, she's not coughing anymore is she? Seriously Jim, she can't feel her feet. Good shit isn't it Sis? Giggling the whole time. She's not dying Rita, she's drunk. Now leave her the hell alone and enjoy the peace and quiet. She's been hacking since she got out of her damn truck.
I never learned what all the Doc Johnson special contained except whiskey.
But I have a shot or a couple drinks every time my throat hurts. And tonight...tonight I just wish he would make me a Doc Johnson special.
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