Isabella Marie Boyer, Belle, Bellekins, Isabella Moonday, Marie, Bella...
Dear Percie-
I know, I know graduation is a ways away, but here is what
is going to happen. That time will RUSH
like the waves on the ocean and it will pull you under and you will be
overwhelmed. And you will get so many
cards and letters and gifts and moolah and you will not remember a word of
this, so I am going to send it now.
You remind me so much of myself it is not even funny. And no NOT THAT WAY…I know you like boys…I
did too once. Hee hee! My point is that you seriously have one of
the biggest hearts of any and all the people I know and I know a lot of people. My only wish is that EVERYONE knew you the
way I know you…
You have been obstinate (stubborn and bull-headed) since you
were old enough to walk. And from the
moment you were aware you could control any and all situations. One of my first memories of you when you were
a little imp was the time you got salmonella.
I have never seen a child so pissed off in all of my life. They had your IV in your arm, wrapped in a
board, because apparently you thought A) you didn't need it and wanted it out of there and B) it pissed
you off and hurt. The first time I came
to the hospital I believe you just screamed and banged it on the side of the
bed. The next time you didn't want
anyone to touch you, just your mom, but you held that damn board up like “look…does
this look fun to you?” You loved your
Gram Rosie though I know you barely remember her. You adored untying her shoes. Papa Jim would always tell you that a mouse
went by the house on a motorcycle and you would sit in that picture window and watch
and watch…and one day you said we couldn't go outside because it was “too coal
and whinny.” I think we still say that
to this day. And whenever it would
thunder you would grab your head, cover your ears and scream at the top of your
lungs, “make the thunda stop!”
You and your brother X’ed every baby sitter you ever
had. Including Gram Rita a few
times. You two were quite the tag
team. I doubt your brother knew then how
much he needed you. He may still not
know, but he will. You have been and
always will be one another’s best friend, don’t ever lose that FOR ANYONE or anything. And I mean that. Let no one come between you.
You are still obstinate.
I have never met another human being so set in their ways. Deep down under that hard tough exterior you
do care and you care a lot. You care a
lot about what people think of you and you always have. You will never, ever, ever be able to see
yourself as others see you, nor will you ever feel good enough. Unfortunately we have that in common. This makes it incredibly easy for people to
hurt you, incredibly hard to trust anyone and horribly difficult to have faith
in yourself.
Right now you are 16.
You think you have things figured out.
Trust me you don’t. Find me when
you are 40 and see if you have yet. I
think life is one constant learning experience.
What fun would it be if we had everything figured out? I don’t care if you think you know everything;
just don’t be opposed to constantly learning.
You will get yourself in a lot of trouble if you think you KNOW IT ALL.
You have had to bust your ass to learn. No one knows how hard this was for you as I
do. College was very, very hard for me
and I was basically an average student in high school…still to this day, at my
current job, I have to learn things a certain way. I am here to tell you and remind you as often
as I need to that you ARE NOT, NOR HAVE YOU EVER BEEN, stupid or dumb. I don’t give a flying shit if you “needed
help.” That is what it was there for.
You learn differently than your peers (friends and classmates.) It means you are different and that is a good
thing. It is not your fault or your
responsibility that unfortunately it’s hard for teachers to teach to all the
differences in each kid. You did the
best you could. And everyone that knows
you and loves you knows that.
I have so many wishes for you I don’t know where to start.
Dream your own dreams.
I don’t care what mom and dad say, they cannot live your life. Follow your own heart and don’t try to do
things to make THEM happy…it will only make you miserable later. Go to college. Learn, experience. Meet new people. Meet people who have nothing in common with
you. JUDGE no one because not only do
you not want judged but you have no right.
Join clubs, take long walks, listen to all kinds of music, try all kinds
of food, do things you can never picture yourself doing (that are legal)
because you will feel so alive and free for having done so. You have worked as long as you were old enough
to walk, mostly raising livestock. You
were one of the best employees I had at the bar and I believe it is because you
love to be hands on and learn by experience.
There was no book in the world that could have taught you that, in fact
I taught you nothing, I made you watch.
Most importantly don’t try to fix other peoples problems…
You are the perfect girl.
You are the girl next door, who can dress to the nines and in 45 seconds
be covered in mud. Boys dig that
shit. Even if they act like they don’t. You deserve the moon, so don’t accept a few
stars. And I am not kidding about
that. Go, have fun, live life, meet
people, but don’t you dare commit to a life you are not happy with or with
someone you cannot call your best friend.
Most boys come and go…hang on to your best friends and nurture those
friendships always.
Despite what kids your age think about sex right now or what
you may have learned, it is something incredibly special and it is not a
joke. And can change your life in a
second. If anyone suggests that it is
necessary for them to maintain a relationship with you, it is usually the best
way to tell you don’t need them. You are
going to do whatever you want, no matter what I say, I just want you to know
that the right one will never give you an ultimatum or make you do something
you don’t want or don’t believe in. That doesn't just go for sex.
Don’t be naïve. That
means too trustworthy. Especially of
strangers. Ask lots of questions. If they are sincere, they will answer them
and prove themselves to you. And it is
ok to ask someone to prove they mean what they say.
You are about to embark on some of the most confusing,
exciting, strangest days of your life.
Some will be good and some will not be.
Embrace them all. It is okay to
be scared. Sometimes fear pushes us into
greatness. Some days, a lot of them
really, none of it will make sense…I have issues with this today. It’s ok.
It’s ok to cry. It’s ok to
laugh. It’s ok to scream. Just remember whatever emotion those days
evoke, that it is OK.
Also remember that you are going to mess up. And probably a lot. But it will never stop me from loving
you. Ever. It’s how we learn. My biggest fear is that you will refuse to “let
go.” You will refuse to go a little bit
crazy. And because of that I will leave
you with this one last wish I have for you…and I hope you never forget it.
When you graduate this spring/summer, your life will truly begin. And it is one incredibly crazy ride from
here. You won’t always enjoy it, but it
can be everything you want it to be. Don’t
let anyone or anything stand in your way.
Ever.
Good luck Percie. I
love you all the way to the moon and back.
Infinity and beyond.
Love Aunt Tiff
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