The real world sucks ass...

The unthinkable has occurred in the past few days…I have had nothing to say.  Like I don’t even have things I want to talk about.  I think I am tired of thinking.  It’s been an overwhelming month to be honest…and one I can safely say I am ready to end.  And not because I have a big birthday coming up.  Because I just want May to be over. 

I got involved in watching The Hatfield’s & The McCoy’s on the History channel this past week.  Partially because it is interesting, this feud that basically JUST ended about 9 years ago.  But mostly because I wanted to focus on something, anything, other than my own life.  No, I don’t hate my life.  I am overwhelmed in it.  And to be honest, I have no reason to be.  Probably because I like to assume more roles than necessary.  But anyway, I wanted something to look forward to.  That didn’t involve a divorce, a doctor, an apartment, an Emergency Room, tests, work, $, etc.  You know, the list goes on.  I think I had such an incredible weekend frying my skin because I didn’t have to think about those things then either.  But then reality sets back in and well, it’s back to the real world.  And sometimes the real world sucks ass. 

98% of the time, when I get home from work, the excitement Brodie extends to me is enough.  Like I am the best thing in his life.  However, 2% of the time, it would be nice if that same emotion was extended from a human.  Every once in a while, a person just needs a hug.  And it’s not just the weather, because I asked for this.  I asked it to cool off and for the sun to take a break because even though I look like a little Bahama Mama, I was really burning underneath…so I am glad today that it is cold and rainy, no it does not help my frame of mind, but I asked for it.  The last time I asked God for a break, I also got that too…a big break…so I am trying to be careful for what I wish for.

Above all, this too shall pass…whatever it is…the funk…the weather…whatever. 

 Plus I have been told my "approach" may be too abrupt and that I should tone it down when dealing with others, specifically co-workers.  Well, here is a real real important news flash, I will have a pissing contest if that's what someone wants to do.  I have worked in so many different situations, with so many different people but I can assure you the situation that doesn't work is the one where someone is constantly putting up resistance against the very people that are trying to help you.  My approach is I will help you, until you start acting like a giant asshole...well, then friend, it's game on.  

I was probably better off just not writing a blog at all.

Mother Teresa...or in my eyes, Saint Teresa

I honestly thought people would jump on yesterday’s question of the day.  About ½ as many as normally answer.  What one famous person, who has passed, would you ask a question, and only one, to?  A few people picked relatives.  But that wasn’t the question!  No, it’s ok…I know we all have someone who has passed who we wish we could talk to one more time…

The answers that I did get were great.  Elvis, Johnny Carson, Abe Lincoln, Anna Nicole Smith, Princess Diana, Dick Clark, Michael Jackson, Ron Santo, Jackie Kennedy, Jimmy Hoffa, and Jesus.  And the questions were great as well. 

There are a lot of people I would love to go and ask a question.  People who have passed.  Famous people.  Any Kennedy really.  Someone who passed on the Titanic.  Martin Luther King.  Abe Lincoln.  Princess Diana.  Walter Payton.  Quite a diverse group really.  Mostly because of the impact they still have on all of our lives, in ways most of us don’t even know.

But, I can only pick one.  And I pick Mother Teresa.  For pretty much the exact same reason Amy Jo wanted to talk to her as well.  Why all the suffering?  But not just that.  More than that, what allowed her to maintain her faith in spite of it all?  In spite of all of the suffering she witnessed, how on earth did she still have any faith in humanity? I personally would have given up long before.  I couldn’t see that much hate, anger, and suffering, any of it and ever believe that the outcome would be worth it all.  I will let my friends at Wikipedia tell you everything you need to know about her.  More or less, she is still not a Saint, because according to the Catholic Church a 2^nd miracle has not been attributed to her.  I am pretty sure in my eyes that fact that she was so humble was a miracle in and of itself.  I would also want to know her real opinion of the Church.  I know how she felt about Jesus…I want to know how she felt about the institution.  One of the most profound things she ever said, that remains with me daily…she said this when she accepted her award for the Nobel Peace Prize in 1979…

"Around the world, not only in the poor countries, but I found the poverty of the West so much more difficult to remove. When I pick up a person from the street, hungry, I give him a plate of rice, a piece of bread, I have satisfied. I have removed that hunger. But a person that is shut out, that feels unwanted, unloved, terrified, the person that has been thrown out from society—that poverty is so hurtable and so much, and I find that very difficult."

She was and will remain a far better woman and human being than I will ever be.  I have a lot of compassion in my heart, but not to that degree…and I haven’t seen a hundredth of the horribleness she had. 

My absolute favorite Mother Teresa quote…and I may have already blogged this before, but more people need to live this way. 

Duck Dynasty...yep, you read that right.

If I had to spend one month in a sitcom/TV show/series, which one would I choose and why?  Before I answer that, a surprising # of people chose Happy Days.  That was interesting.  Interesting in that they chose Happy Days for the polar opposite reasons that others, several mind you, chose Sons of Anarchy.  I have not followed Sons of Anarchy, but I have seen it a few times.  I think the bottom line is that a lot of woman find tough ass, scruffy, motorcycle men to be extremely sexy.  Bad boys.  Which in and of itself cracks me up, because all of the women that chose that, have men so totally opposite of that kind of guy…what does that mean anyway?  When you fantasize about someone who is the complete opposite of the person you are actually with?  

Anyway…Big Bang Theory had a couple, which is funny too…I do enjoy that show.  I am pretty sure a couple days with Sheldon would be enough for me…30 may be pushing it. 

Interestingly the most picked show was Duck Dynasty.  It’s a reality show, of course, on A & E.  It is the last show on the planet you would expect me to watch, but is probably in my top 5 favorite shows right now.  Honest to God.  A lot of it seems scripted, but the show follows a very close family of redneck hillbilly millionaires.  For real.  They made their fortune creating and selling Duck Calls.  Who knew?  They live as if they have the money, but don’t act like it?  It’s hard to explain.  Like the mom and dad still live in their modular home with several additions, out in the swamps...Yes, they all have hundreds of toys, boats, wheelers, helicopter, mansion, nice trucks…but the funny part is they still live off the land.  Hunt, fish, etc., pretty much eat everything they catch.  I am sorry, but I laugh out loud.  I love them.  I would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to spend a month with any of them.  I think they may be good looking men under their crazy ass beards…and interestingly they have beautiful wives.  It’s just a fun ass show.  I don’t feel like they are over the top.  They are so close, the whole family, like they pretty much do everything together.  I am sure a lot of it is for the cameras, but somehow you can sense the sincerity, that doesn’t exist with most shows on right now.

That’s my choice.  30 days in West Monroe, Louisiana.  I would probably look just fine in camo.  I don’t know that I want to shoot anything, but I love boats and mud and fishing and who doesn’t want to be a part of a family that sits down to dinner, THE WHOLE FAMILY, at least once a week. 

If you haven’t watched it, try and catch an episode.  If Uncle Si alone doesn’t make you LOL, well, then I got nothing. 

I have included some links for you to check out.  As I type this I cannot believe it myself…that I adore this show.  

Duck Commander-Official Website!

A & E Duck Dynasty-The show

Hugs and Hawaii...

I don’t do compliments well.  At all.  I can dispense them like a Pez, but I am not good at receiving them.  That has nothing to do with how I was raised, I received them from my parents.  It has everything to do with my personal self-worth.  I would imagine that the majority of us have a hard time receiving them.  Like, I am not abnormal in that respect.  Abnormal yes, but not in that respect.

What it the most common compliment I receive?  Hmmmm…probably that I give the best hugs.  If that is not at the top then it’s how non-judgmental I am.  I am sure I have discussed how non-judgmental I am in several previous blogs, so I won’t bore you with that again.  But I do give amazing hugs.  A hug is an incredibly powerful tool.  To me it’s like a handshake.  When I go to shake someone’s hand and they hand me this limp fish thing, or they barely react to you grabbing your hand, it says a lot about a person.  Sure, some people aren’t big fans of human contact, (which I personally think is silly) but regardless, a firm, acknowledging hand shake goes a long with me.  As does a hug.  I am a hugger.  But not just to a random person.  If I give you one, I damn well mean to.  And I HATE, HATE, HATE patters.  Seriously.  Do not PAT my back if you hug me.  For God’s sake squeeze.  Participate in the hug.  If you act like I am about to break you when I hug you, it’s probably a good idea to stand far enough back that I know you don’t want one.  But regardless of the strength of your hug, if you pat me, simply just look at me and say, I am a patter.  Sorry Tiff.  And I will respect you.  But if you hug me and pat…well, it isn’t pretty.  Sister…is a patter.  And so is Bella.  Kolbie will hug you till your ribs break… that is another extreme.  Jarod pats.  Dad, well I don’t hug enough to keep record of.  Mom, well, mom is like hugging the wind…simply just not much there.  But regardless, I love hugs.  I love giving them, receiving them.  There is no BAD time for a hug…we are human, we want touched.  Most of us.  Hugs are amazing gifts…and so damn, well you know, free.  Try hugging someone today, I guarantee it will brighten their day.

If I had to move tomorrow, to any state or any country, I am guessing that the majority of you would ASSUME I would say Minnesota, or even Wisconsin for that matter.  I can honestly say my heart is very, very happy there.  Especially along the St. Croix River, where I feel I get the best of both worlds.  But some of the happiest days of my life were spent in northern Minnesota as well.  From Bemidji to Duluth and UP!  I love it there.  I eat, sleep, and breathe better there.

However, I also fell madly in love with Las Vegas, even though that is the polar opposite of Minnesota, there was something about the place.  Not on the strip, or even that close to it, but close enough.  I am not a gambler, so that isn’t it…I cannot quite put my finger on it.

Since I can only choose one answer, drum roll please…I choose Hawaii.  As incredibly difficult as that drastic of a lifestyle change was for me, something soaked in my bones that I have never felt anywhere else.  It probably had something to do with the incredible beauty that your eyes experienced every time you opened them, no matter where you were.  I fell deeply in love with Kona and the “boho” atmosphere.  So laid back.  So incredibly breathtaking.  I also fell madly in love with Kauai…that is a beauty you cannot put into words.  I suppose I was spoiled in a way, in that everyone I was surrounded by were incredibly happy people because the majority of them were on vacation.  But the locals I did get to meet were amazingly relaxed as well.  How could you not be?  But I honestly the one thing I remember is how it smelled.  Walking along the beach, soaking up the salt water air…it was my favorite part about going back to the ship, having that smell on me…that ship smelled, well, less than comfy, but…yeah…anyway, I pick Hawaii.  I want to go back to Hawaii. 

The pictures you are seeing on my post are actually pics I took in Hawaii.

"21"

Is 21 the "right" age to be able to legally drink alcohol and if NOT, what age do you think it should be?  I loved, loved, and loved the answers this question evoked.  From all walks of life.  I wasn’t expecting the diversity of answers to be honest, but they were great. 

If I were asked this I would immediately say a human being should be able to drink legally when the country deems it is ok for that human being to go to war and to vote.  It just makes sense to me.  But then again, nothing this country decides or approves or doesn’t approve makes sense, so why should this.  And I agree that if a person cannot drink until 21, then they can’t go to war either. 

Let’s be honest.  It doesn’t matter when it is “legal” we have all drank before it was.  If you didn’t, kudos to you.  I personally don’t know if allowing kids to drink sooner would increase the DUI’s or drunk driving accidents or deaths, I just know that once a person is 21 and you can do it legally, it is not nearly as thrilling as it is taking your chances and drinking illegally.  I am almost 40 and I have gotten just as drunk at this age, as I did when I was in college.  And I swear I will never drink again.  Maturity is relative to each individual.  I agree I wouldn’t want to sit at a bar with most 18 year olds, probably because the things we value in life will be drastically different, but I also agree there are people who are my age who also have drastically different values and I don’t want to share a bar with them either.  It’s kind of like driving.  Some people are more equipped at driving at 16 years old, than others.  It’s impossible to make it per that person’s ability.  If that’s the case, then most “Senior Citizens” should lose their license based on the fact that their ability to drive is gone.  Not every 70 year old has this problem though.  It would be nice if everyone had to take a class, to prove they had the right mind and capacity to vote, drink, drive, PARENT, whatever, but unfortunately we don’t live in a world where that is possible. 

Responsibility is learned.  We aren’t born knowing it.  Some of us are better at it than others.  You really don’t want my opinion on World Peace (i.e. no wars) or legalizing pot…I suppose that is an entirely different blog.  I do agree with a comment made though…in regards to other countries.  I think we are a much bigger mess than a lot of countries.  A hot mess really.

  Canada seems like a nice place to live.  

Name my yacht!

Wow.  If someone gave me a yacht, but I had to name it before I could take possession, I would be screwed…because it would be like naming a pet…it would have to be perfect.  And it would have to say so very much, with so few words.  And we all know I have a problem with that.  Using few words that is.  I suppose I could just call it “No Words.” 

Let’s be honest…it should be called “Rolling in the Deep.” Duh.  I mean how easy and simply perfect is that?  Aside from that, I decided to see who reads my blog.  Let’s just say for shits and giggles, I did get a yacht and it did have to be named and I struggled to commit to a name because commitment in general scares me, so I had a contest.  The name picked most, would be the name I choose.  Rolling in the Deep is not an option; because well, that’s just too easy, so let’s pretend it’s not on the table.

So, if you read my blog…please vote in the following contest! 

NAME TIFFANY’S NEW YACHT! 

  (I cannot wait to see the rumors this will generate.) Remember, it’s for me, forever.

Here are your options:

Aye Sea U

Barely A Wake

Whatever Floats Your Boat

Dela-ca-seas

Yachts of Fun

Devocean

Sea Clusion

Sea Esta

Sea Ya

Sea’s The Day

Ecstasea

Fah Get A Boat It

FRUSTRATED and I need to vent, this is as good a place as any...

Uggggggh. That seems to be the only word my brain can form at this point.  This past week has sucked.  On so many levels, and in so many ways.  Trust me when I say, other peoples weeks have been far worse, I understand that.  But this is what I have to deal with right now and it’s a lot.

Between being in the ER last week with my mother, at my wit’s end with my father, and the ER again with my sister, I wouldn’t mind finding a little retreat, and taking it. 

Collectively, 12 entire hours were spent in an ER.  I am not sure when the ER became the DMV, but it did.  Apparently no one likes their jobs there and all they want to talk about is when they get to go home.  

Perhaps it is me, but if I start with a patient, I will tell them when my shift ends and that someone else is taking over.  Maybe its state law, that you just leave and not tell the patient what is going on.  Instead, we started with one group and ended with another.  And somehow between the two shift changes, everything you told the previous group, gets lost in translation.

I cannot complain about my ER appearance when I broke my leg.  I believe when you come in via an ambulance and you are screaming your bloody head off, they tend to get to you faster so they can get you to shut the hell up.  Maybe I was lucky.  Maybe I just happened to have the crème de la crème of staff that night, but I cannot say enough nice things about all of the staff that had to tend to me.  I feel bad for them, but they were empathetic and did their jobs.  In the two times in the past week that I had to be back in the same said ER, I did not see a single one of those people except one of the Dr.’s. 

No, I could not eat a live cricket...

I don’t know if I will have a question of the day today, as we have a lot going on and my heart is elsewhere right now, but I have to respond to the last one I posed.  I mean this is how this works.

As badly as I need $40,000, I do not believe I could eat a bowl full of live crickets.  I don’t even know if I could eat them if they were not alive either.  It’s gross.  And I realize that is a lot of money but I could not eat them without wondering what the hell was going on with them when they got downstairs ya know?  Meaning my stomach.  Even if they were dead, they have a lot of really disgusting parts.  And I realize that they are a delicacy in some countries and kudos to them, I mean that is just great, but they are not a delicacy in my country so there is no need for me to get excited about them.  A couple live crickets?  Maybe.  Maybe I could force myself to eat a couple, but not a bowl full.  Hell no.  I imagine there are quite a few things I would do for $40K, but obviously this is not one of them.  The nightmares alone would not be worth it.

Security...

It would be easier to tell you what makes me feel insecure right now then it would be to tell you what makes me feel secure.  I honestly don’t know if I have ever truly felt security in my life.  A hug feels good.  I don’t know that I have had one that made me feel secure.  Probably because I always have a pessimistic attitude when it comes to good things happening to me, so I am sure when I was getting these hugs, in the back of my mind I was probably waiting for the other shoe to fall.  And it always did…

Money doesn’t make me feel secure.  I’ve never had enough and probably never will to ever feel that way.  Who knows though?  Stranger things have happened. 

I wouldn’t feel secure if I had my own place; even though I am working diligently towards that at the moment…home means more than 4 walls around you.  Having my own physical location just means I have shelter, that’s my own private space.  I suppose that can be gone in a matter of seconds for a variety of reasons, but I don’t know that it would make me feel secure. 

I don’t have a favorite blanket or pillow.  I just really like my bed or any comfy bed will do. 

A job is never guaranteed so I don’t necessarily feel secure in that.

I suppose the thing that makes me feel most secure is Brodie and his unconditional love.  No matter what happens, that doesn’t change.  He is just as excited to see me if I have been gone 8 hours or 8 minutes.  He acts like I hung the moon.  Everyone needs something that makes them feel like that.

The ugliest thing I know...

What is the ugliest thing I know and why?  I know some pretty ugly things.  I have seen some pretty ugly things.  I was kind of headed that direction with this question…like what is the ugliest thing you PERSONALLY know or have seen or have felt.  Yes it is depressing, but ugly shit happens every day.  It doesn’t go away, I wish it would, but it doesn’t. 

This produced a lot of answers which I honestly didn’t expect that it would.  But I am grateful for that.  I was not surprised by the answers, at all.  I think it is safe to say that you can sum them all up in one nice, neat little pile.  The way we treat others…especially those who are different.  Black, white, Jewish, Catholic, gay, straight, disabled…abuse falls under that category as well.  And I am here to tell you that I have witnessed the destruction verbal abuse causes…minimizing someone’s feelings or making another person feel inferior especially in front of others may be one of the worst things I have seen.  I have never personally witnessed physical abuse.  I know it’s out there.  I know it exists.  And I am also here to tell you that physical abuse is NOT exclusive to woman and children.  Men are physically abused as well.  Mentally and emotionally too.  As well as animals.

If you don’t know me real well, you should by reading this blog.  I tie my heart to something…I try real, real hard not to, because my heart is a vulnerable little sucker.  Actually it can be a real son of a bitch at times because it FEELS SO MUCH.  I think that I would have to say the ugliest thing I know would be when someone takes away another human beings spirit.  Via, physical, mental, verbal, emotional or spiritual abuse.  Or even by being ignored, discarded.

If you live under a rock you are unaware of this new crusade I am on.  I have no earthly clue how I am going to go about helping to resolve this problem, but I am working that out.  I follow Ashley Judd (actress, sister to Wynonna, etc.) on Twitter.  She was really adamant awhile back about saving this dog.  One dog.  In a world where we live with thousands of homeless animals.  This one captured her heart.  And he did because of how he arrived in her life.  “Walter” was thrown out of a moving vehicle, with a leash and the yard stake still attached.  He was starving to death.  Well, you can read the story by clicking here TEAM WALTER…I have put it on my FB page a couple times now.  I have no idea why this hit me square in the solar plexus.  I guess because when I realized that this has occurred to other dogs since Walter and that witnesses have seen it happen, I got real, real angry.  If you saw this, what the hell would you do?  We live in a world where most of us stand back and do nothing.  I am sorry, but we don’t.  Nobody wants to get involved.  Not their business.  Well, if I saw this or anything remotely like it to an animal, an adult, a child, whatever, I would not sit by and watch.  I couldn’t.  I don’t possess that skill.  To sit back and do nothing.  Actually, that may be the ugliest thing I know.  That people DO NOTHING.  I would rather have a person be pissed off at me for involving myself and possibly reaching the wrong conclusion, than to walk away and hope for the best.  I would like to think that I would have called 911 and told them where I saw the dog thrown so as to get it help and followed that car, truck, whatever until whenever.  Possibly endangering my own life yes, but that is not how I am wired. 

Wow, what a different world this would be if we would embrace our differences.  If we would stand up for those who can’t.  If we all treated each other the way we wanted to be treated.  If the punishment for harming another living creature, fit the crime. 

I can’t sit back and do nothing.  I just can’t.  And if I didn’t need my job I would be down in Tennessee right now, on that road, just sitting.  Extreme?  Perhaps.  I don’t care.  It has to stop.

And one more thing.  If you are someone who has ever crushed someone’s spirit at any point in your life, for whatever reason, apologize.  Who the hell are any of us to do that?  I don’t know how I feel about karma, honestly.  And I don’t know how I feel about people getting what they deserve in the afterlife, because let’s be honest, it doesn’t present the instant gratification I need in this life…but I hope and I pray that any human being who does that, crushes someone or something, for sport, or for fun, or because it happened to them, or because it is just who they are, that someday, somehow, somewhere, SOMETHING crushes them.  

A life skills class would have been handy...

I asked yesterday what teacher most influenced or best prepared you for the real world/college.  Let’s be honest not all of us go to college…regardless of whether we do, life still goes on and still happens.  Was there a teacher that prepared you for that?  I didn’t get many answers to be honest and a couple I did get basically told me who DIDN’T prepare them.

I personally feel like there are a lot of things that classes do not teach you, that yes, sometimes you have to experience them to learn them, but I do think there can be some transitional classes that would be helpful.  I went to Western Illinois University.  I went from a class of 20 students to sometimes 200.  Talk about a little fish in a big pond.  I don’t know that there is anything about coming from a rural school that can prepare you for that.  I had Miss K in 6^th grade.  I believe she did a great job of preparing students for Junior High…but I would have to say as many people and parents disliked her as much as those of us who did like her.  I thought Mr. Klotz prepared me for college English…I don’t know that I can pinpoint one teacher that made a huge difference or one who prepared me for life.  I don’t know that one person could actually do that since we need so many different people in our lives.  What I would have liked is a life skills class.  Either in college or high school.  This is how to balance a checkbook.  This is how to use a credit card properly.  This is how you interact in social situations.  This is how you manage a household and expenses.  I think something like that would have been helpful.  And some diversity classes.  Yes, there are colored people, Chinese people, gay people, straight people, people with disabilities, short people, and fat people.  Treat them how you want to be treated.  Regardless of what your peers tell you to do.  A class on how to not let hateful things said about you to you hurt you. Those kinds of classes.  Life skills. 

My favorite teacher...

Yesterday’s question of the day brought some new peeps out of the woodwork and I LOVE IT!  I suppose more people read it than I realize, but not everyone answers!  I asked who was your favorite teacher from Kindergarten to senior year of high school.  Not the teacher who influenced you the most or who had the most impact on you, although those could definitely be the same person.  Generally though I think if you think about it, you can definitely separate them…especially if you further your education.  As sometimes, a professor in college can impact you far differently than say in High School.

Next to being a parent, I think it may have to be the second hardest and most underpaid job in the world.  Think about it.  Besides yourself, who else spends that kind of time with your children?  What kind of social skills are they getting from adults if not from you?  Probably their teachers and or day care providers.  I am very much not a teacher for the same reason I am most likely not a parent.  Some kids would flat out break my heart.  I would want to take them home with me.  And by the time I had taken all the kids home that I wanted to help, and all the animals that I want to save, I would need a damn big yard and house. 

A teacher not only has the daunting task of educating a group of students who all learn a different way, but they also have to deal with each one of their individual personal issues.  I cannot wrap my hands around some of the “bags” that some kids have to carry to school.  To not only sift through that, but to also be able to separate yourself from it emotionally and focus on the task at hand, which is to teach, well, I personally could not do it. 

I got a lot of negative comments about a post I made quite a while back about how some kids learn.  Mostly because it was thought that I was speaking without doing some research.  I couldn’t be a teacher, I have said that a million times and I have nothing but respect for those that do.  But, I do know that not all teachers are the same and yes they are under appreciated a majority of the time.  For all intents and purposes it can be a pretty thankless job.  I am not naïve enough to say that some really shouldn’t be teaching either, but that is not what this post is about.

My favorite teacher.  It would be incredibly easy to say Mrs. Patterson.  Good lord, who didn’t love that woman and who didn’t she love.  To this day, she is still the same.  Pretty hard to say that about someone, I mean really WHO NEVER CHANGES?  Well, she didn’t.  And I think your first teacher definitely sets the tone for a child…

However, as much as I have to give props to Mrs. Patterson, my favorite teacher of that period of time in my life has to be Miss Nancy Ischer.  She was not at Valley very long, but she was my 5^th grade teacher.  5^th grade was also a pivotal year for me.  It was the first year I remember being teased.  It was the year I had to get glasses.  I can pretty much remember how ridiculous they looked but what I most remember is how she made me feel and by helping me realize that having to wear glasses wasn’t the end of the world.  I wasn’t going to die.  Even if Johnny teased me to death.  She was so compassionate and sincere and such a great teacher and human being.  This is also when my arthritis really started affecting my life and I will never forget the way she made sure I didn't feel "different" because of it.  I remember the first time I disappointed her, but I don’t know if she ever knew that it wasn’t my fault.  Alisa Mitchell somehow convinced me to shut Lori Baker in one of the lockers in the bathroom, and we couldn’t get her out.  The principal was called as well as the janitor.  I had to go to the office.  I will never forget her telling me it was not something she would ever dream I would do.  Peer pressure Miss Ischer, peer pressure.  It was a bitch.  I am pretty sure I was not much of a follower of others after that. 

Miss Ischer showed up at my bar once and asked if I remembered who she was.  It took me a second; I mean it had been how many years?  But she is still the most wonderful, compassionate person she was all of those years ago.  And she is still teaching.  She and her family are going through a lot right now and I sincerely hope she knows I think about her and them often and am keeping them in my prayers. 

I still have glasses, well obviously…but now I make a fashion statement with them.  Cause, well, you know me, I am such a fashion icon.  

To bathe or not to bathe...

Would you rather go a week without bathing, but be able to change your clothes, or a week without a change of clothes, but be able to bathe?  That was Friday’s question of the day.  At the surface it appears to be an easy question to answer, until you read it.  And I mean really read it.  A lot of assumptions have to take place in a question such as this.  And I hate assumptions.  Hate them.  I am not saying I don’t personally make them myself, I do, and I shouldn’t, but I still hate them.

Personally, the truth is I love to smell good.  LOVE IT.  For whatever reason I have a good chemistry and my body is able to hold onto scents for a while.  You know how some people put on perfume or whatever and it’s gone really quickly?  Or lotion?  Not I.  For the most part depending on what I use, you can smell it for hours.  I love that.  HOWEVER…I absolutely hate taking a shower.  For the record, I take one every single day…usually at night, makes your sheets last longer if you get in them clean.  But anyway, it’s probably right up there with my least favorite things I have to do in a day.  I would probably rather run than shower.  I know, WTF.  I have no idea, it just seems like I have to completely stop everything I am doing and clean myself.  And I am usually doing nothing.  But I have no rhyme or reason for this; it’s just the way I feel.  I could also wear the same clothes for a week for sure.  In fact I have.  In fact, I can tell you that I have recently.  When I broke my leg.  Showering was an epic deal.  And until you have that happen, you don’t even realize how much you need two working legs to bathe.  Anyway, I once said I could live in my warm-up pants and I pretty much did for about 8 weeks (they were washed yes.) So in reality, I didn’t bathe or change clothes for at least a couple days, because it was like turning the Titanic around to do so.  Since that was not an option I gave though I would say I could go without bathing but change clothes.  And if the truth be known, I am OCD about once I have had a bath/shower.  I cannot put on clothes I have already worn.  That makes my skin crawl thinking about it.

So the moral of this story is I would rather be able to change clothes, but not bathe.  You can make yourself smell good without having a bath.  Now, I am pretty sure I would need a bath in a week.  I could never go longer than that. 

The majority of you however, need a bath and could wear the same clothes.  Not I said the Tiff.  If I bathe, it’s gotta be all new, fresh smelling clothes.  

  

Since most of us don’t have to make this choice, just bathe…daily.  It’s sanitary. 

Invisible...

Interestingly I did not specify if my question of the day yesterday included time travel.  Mostly because I didn’t know it was necessary.  But that is one of the fun things about questions and different people’s responses.  I just want people to tell me the first thing they think about…it’s not necessary to launch the shuttle, but some people really get into their answers! 

The question was if you could be invisible for one hour where would you want to go.  A lot of people chose Heaven, which I thought was rather interesting.  Because I imagine our vision of Heaven is very different for all of us.  A couple chose picked the White House, which I would not be interested in at all.  You couldn’t pay me to get involved in politics in any way shape or form.  Nor do I want to spend an hour hearing about them.  A few wanted to follow their kids around, to see how they act in different environments, especially when the parent is not around.  That would be interesting.  Or not?

Where would I go if I could be invisible for an hour?  I refuse to name names but I think I would go be in a room where I was being talked about.  You know how you just KNOW people are nice to your face, but otherwise probably say not so nice things?  Yeah, well, I know it happens and I would like to be there to hear it.  Not because I enjoy being talked about in an unfavorable way, but because I would have the proof I need to confirm that they were just being nice to my face.  I hate fake people.  Especially to my face.  So that is probably where I would go…get the confirmation I needed.

It’s Kentucky Derby weekend.  Which is bittersweet for me, but I think it’s something I should do before I die…although I cannot see myself getting a gown for it.

The most awesome person I know...

Who is the most awesome person I know and why?  This question is being brought to you by my friend Nicki Fox.  I personally thought it would bring more responses, but when I tried to answer it myself I realized how hard it was and how much it would entail to answer.  Before I continue on, if you ask me to post a question of the day, you get mentioned in my Blog.  It’s that simple. 

I have known OF Nic forever, but I only really got to meet her when I owned the bar.  Nic is the kind of person you want with you at EVERY party.  Even if that party is on the sandbar.  She is so much fun.  And I have so much FUN with her.  I don’t know exactly when we got to be better friends or even why, but I know that I can completely be myself with Nicki and that means the world to me.  My fondest memory is of a night several months ago when I just wanted to sit home and feel sorry for myself, but she was having none of it.  She physically drove over and got me and we had one of the best nights ever.  It was spontaneous and random, but damn fun.  My other favorite is of her being my “Hype Girl” during Labor Day weekend of last year, when we drove around in Dad’s borrowed Case all-terrain vehicle and basically carried everyone’s river chairs!  Thanks for the question Nicki and thanks for being a great friend. 

First and foremost this was probably one of the hardest questions for me to answer because, well, I know a lot of amazing people.  People who do amazing things.  People who conquer amazing odds.  People who go to amazing lengths.  I honestly don’t know that I have ONE AMAZING person in my life.  But I think I can type through this and arrive at ONE person, since that would be following the rules.

GOOD LORD this is harder than it seems.  Maybe it would be easier if I could tell you what an awesome person possesses in my eyes.  Unselfish.  Compassionate.  Passionate.  Sincere.  Has probably been dealt a pretty shitty hand in life, but someone who makes everyone else around them feel like things could be a lot worse.  Positive.  Provides affirmation.  Dependable.  Supportive.  Kind.  Thoughtful.  See, that was a lot easier than naming a person.  However, now that I listed all of those words I can safely ask the question, “do I know anyone that is like that?”

I do.  My mom.  My mom is beautifully flawed.  Sorry mom, but you are.  You have made poor choices, bad decisions, handled things not as well as you probably could have…we all have.  We all will.  We all do.  I know I have said it so many times it is not funny, but my mom has the biggest heart of anyone I know.  She is far from perfect, but it’s her imperfections that make her awesome.  Plus she created me.  I know Dad helped, but she carried me.  She gave birth to me.  She created this (I NEVER TOOT MY OWN HORN, SO HERE GOES) amazing, awesome human being who truly loves people, places and things unconditionally.  I would not be half of the person I am today without her and I truly feel like that is a blessing. 

I love my mommy.  I guess I know two awesome people!  Mom and I!

What you should know Wednesdays...

First I laughed and then I gagged and then I laughed again...I don't think I have ever personally hocked a lugie in public, and would die if I had and it was filmed.

Really?  REALLY?  Even Dolphins are getting bullied?  This totally blows.

They were sunbathing in the street why?  Was the yard too small?  I don't understand.

This disgusts me, but then again, it's just a reminder that we still have so far to go.

And last but not least, in case you were feeling like a lazy bum, this should make you feel otherwise.

Happy Wednesday!

Memories

This required some thought…and I don’t know that it has a good answer to be honest.  Would I rather lose all of my old memories or never be able to make new ones.  This was less of I really do have an answer to this versus more I was curious what people would say.

What happens to us, what we remember, where we have been, what we learned, form us into the person we are today.  Right now.  Who I am RIGHT NOW, is a direct result of everything that happened to me PRIOR to today.  With that being said, I would rather lose all of those, good and bad, and make new ones from here on out.  I guess by saying that I am telling you that I want to leave the past in the past.  And the reason that I can honestly tell you that is because there has been some pretty painful stuff happen to me in the last 10 years.  I would love to let it go.  I would move forward, not necessarily knowing why I feel a certain way about something, but it would be like starting with a clean slate.

So, I think it’s personal for everyone.  But seriously.  I would be really mad if from this point forward I could not make new memories.  

If you want to Judge, perhaps you should go back to law school...

Apparently a few of you would like to fart in public and not be judged.  I suppose if you want the truth I would rather be able to do that and not laugh hysterically, because let’s be honest, people fart.  If you don’t you are full of shit.  Literally.  Or hot air.  Which is the same thing. 

The answers provided as usual, were varied and interesting.  This is a tough question for me to answer because let’s be honest, nothing stops me from doing something for fear of being judged.  So with that being said it made me feel really bad when I learned that some people would be “more themselves” than they are, especially in public.  Or be more social.  Or say what they really feel.  This is incredibly hard for me to wrap my hands around, because I am so polar opposite of that.  I would venture a guess, that if I was to ask people to give 3 reasons why they like me that would be one of the three.  That I am myself, that I am social and that I ALWAYS say what I feel.   Sometimes that is a gift.  Sometimes that is a curse.  But I can tell you for sure if I had to be someone or something else, I would explode.

If I had a dollar for every time Sister said “I can’t believe you did that, or said that…” well, I would be rich.  I just don’t see the point in it all if I have to be someone I am not.  Then I get, well, you choose your battles.  Ok.  I get that.  We all choose our battles.  I just have never understood the battle to be someone I am not, or to pretend I don’t feel a certain way, or to act a certain way for other people.  That is preposterous to me.  And I take that for granted.  And I shouldn’t.  But I do.