Do you hear what I hear?

So, over a week ago, Sister and I went to Wal-Mart for groceries.  We were way out of the mood by the time we actually got there and in all honesty Sister never was in the mood.  So of course all I wanted was to get my cart and skeedadle away from her.

Not a fan of the place, but let’s be honest…where else can you do your all at once shopping.  My issue is that I rarely need the middle of the store.  I need dog treats and grocery.  And they are literally on complete opposite sides of the store from one another.  I am not kidding when I say the Dingo bones that Brodie HAS TO HAVE are in the farthest right corner of the store (that is still the store and not the auto service center or the seasonal area.) 

Needless to say, when I came in I heard a child screaming…I mean screaming.  Not a whimpering cry because he didn’t get a toy, a solid blood curdling scream, sob, whatever.  This child was somewhere in the store and I thought to myself, thank God he/she is not right next to me.  I can’t handle screaming kids.  Let me define that better.  Kids cry, kids get sick, kids get hurt, kids get their feelings hurt, kids get mad at their parents, kids throw tantrums and so on.  I am not talking about that.  I am talking about a kid having a Class 5 meltdown, who for whatever reason happens to be with a parent who simply is ignoring them. 

Mind you, as I go about my shopping, I continue to hear him.  And no, I do not know what is making him cry, I could only imagine.  Please continue to keep in mind that this is not a child who is simply crying.  This is a child who is screaming like someone is beating it.

I continue about my business thinking, holy moly, the kid is still screaming.  I can still hear the poor child.  And much to my dismay he/she is getting closer.  I happen to run into Bella in the Room Freshener aisle…she was looking for her mom who had the cart and she had an arm full of whatever.  Bella: Have you seen my mom?  Me: No, but I feel like my head might explode off my shoulders if that child doesn’t stop screaming.  Bella: Oh my God, me too!  Whew, I am glad I am not the only one because honestly, I love children, all of God’s children, but the screaming, for the love of God has to stop.

My phone is blowing up, I am trying to pick out a Ham Steak, there is screaming all around me, it is Bella telling me they are checking out.  I hate being rushed, especially when making grocery decisions…so now I am stressed and hurrying and I cannot focus.  And then all of sudden, I was cart to cart with the screaming child.  As if my cart had some sort of magnetic device on it and it pulled this child clear across the store and into the bread aisle for the love.  I didn’t need bread.  Why was I in this aisle?  Why is this happening to me?  I look at the child, the mom, the child, the mom.  Here is this little imp, who could not be more than 3 years old, tears pouring out his cheeks like a water faucet, and snot rolling out his nose.  You may not know this about me, but I cannot handle snot, literally I gag.  He didn’t have a little, it was ALL…OVER…HIS…FACE.  In his hair, on his clothes…most likely because he had been screaming since I arrived and who knows how long before that.  His face was blood red.  His mother?  Walking down the aisle as if she had no comprehension that he was even in her cart.

I had a Bleu Burger for lunch, i.e. blue cheese on a hamburger…I can taste blue cheese in my throat, it was not that great of a sandwich going in I sure as hell didn’t want it coming back out.  One dry heave as I pass while I am trying to spit out the words “are you kidding me?”  It didn’t come out anything like that.  I do not even know what it sounded like, I just wanted out of that store.

I know that kids have meltdowns at the worst times and I know sometimes nothing can be done about it.  But for the love of God and all that is Holy do you as the parent enjoy your hour long trip through Wal-Mart with a screaming child who has snot all over itself?  I promise you there is no way in hades that I would take that cart after her.

Tis the season eh?