Coasters and yards

I used to love roller coasters.  I really did.  The thrill of the climb, followed by the stomach dropping feeling of the fall.  The anxiety of the twists and turns and when it was over, the realization that what just occurred was literally less than 45 seconds of your life and you had to wait a really long time for that 45 seconds.   I loved them until I had back surgery, then I no longer loved them.  Plus I do not have the patience to wait in long lines anymore.  If they could make one that wouldn’t beat the crap out of you when you rode it or that you didn’t have to wait in line for, perhaps I would really consider it.  But I don’t think that is going to happen.

Life is one big roller coaster isn’t it?  Full of ups and downs.  Highs and lows.  You think when you are little or younger that you will never survive some of these things and yet as you get older you somehow always do and then you have new ones.   Getting married brings its own set of roller coasters…as does having children.  Taking care of an elderly loved one.  College, divorce, new job…when are we never on one?  I don’t know many people who have so much consistency in their lives that every day is the same and frankly who would want it that way?  The monotony of it all?  Actually I think some people have to have it like that.  But really every single day is a surprise.  Some are good surprises, others are not so good.  There is no possible way to prepare for any of it.  Some people are really good at letting whatever happens happen and others not so much.  I am in the not so much category.

I didn’t want so much control in my life when I was younger and now for some reason I feel like I do.  Even though to be honest it is easier when you don’t have to have it.  I don’t want to control people, places or things necessarily; I just want more control over my life. 

There is a saying that the grass is only greener on the side that you water.  Well, duh?  I mean really, that makes perfect sense doesn’t it?  If you take care of your side and nurture it, it will grow.  Like relationships, the same goes for them.  Or being a parent.  Or whatever…but the phenomenon is the same…whatever you take care of will blossom and thrive…so why is it then, that someone always has what we want?  Why don’t we have it?  Do we want it because we don’t have it?  Do we want it because we know we can never have it?  Will we spend a lifetime of regret if we don’t go get it?  Can we even get it?  Are we ever really satisfied?  I mean I know that there are some people who have everything they can possibly need but can sit down and list you the 10 things they don’t have or want.  I know people who have very little and have everything they could possibly need.  It takes all kinds I guess.

I personally try not to look at my neighbor’s yard.  I mean what I don’t know won’t hurt me right?  I don’t need to know what possessions he has that I long for, because frankly I have lived below my means for so long I wouldn’t know it any other way.  That is not to say I don’t wish I had my own place with my own toys.  I guess there is a very large difference between want and need.

I don’t really know if this blog has a point…it started out talking about roller coasters and ended up on green lawns…I guess it is what it is…